He Hugged Her and Then Looked Again at the Picture With a Face of Warm Silver Significance of Quote
A hug….
It's such a elementary gesture, isn't information technology?
And nevertheless, people seem to continually complicate the meaning of it when it comes to relationships.
Well, this is especially true when information technology comes to women trying to dissect their ex boyfriends every move.
A few weeks ago a woman in our private support grouping posed a question that I have gotten at least a hundred times.
What does it hateful if your ex hugs you? Is it a good thing?
Well, more specifically her exact statement went like this,
And so, does information technology mean anything when an ex hugs you?
Or are you lot overthinking things too much?
Allow's Enquire The Experts…. (Seriously!)
Now, those of you who know me know that when it comes to the content that goes on this website I similar to get WAAYYY above and beyond.
I am likewise not above trying something new.
Now, I know what you are thinking,
"What exercise you mean by that, Chris?"
Well, when information technology comes to an ex hugging you I know exactly where I stand with what I call back (obviously.) However, I wanted to see if other experts in the human relationship field agreed with me so I did something I have never done in the history of this website, I asked them!
More on that in a second.
Over the years I have learned that you oftentimes end up with a better issue when you tackle a question with multiple minds instead of ane.
No seriously…
They have done multiple studies and found that when people work together the ultimate outcome is often better.
It's the 2 minds is better than 1 theory.
And then, here is how I have decided to answer "if hugging means anything" when information technology comes to your ex.
I have decided that I am going to include my opinion with multiple different experts and let the fates make up one's mind! In other words, I am going to give yous my stance which yous tin can follow if you want merely I am as well going to meet what the most mutual answer was among all of us and let the collective group decide the ultimate reply.
After all 2 minds are better than one 😉 .
Of course, doing things this way presents an interesting problem.
Where the heck am I going to find relationship experts?
I'd like to introduce y'all to HARO!
HARO stands for "Help A Reporter Out" and I was basically able to connect with a bunch of experts (similar myself) through information technology and enquire them about the ultimate hugging question of the century 😉 .
Ultimately I was able to connect with 6 experts from all walks of life (relating to relationships.)
For example, some of the experts were licensed psychologists, popular names with relationship websites and psychics.
Alright, plenty build up.
Let's become right down to business concern.
Expert Accept #i: Chris Seiter ( Professional Relationship Consultant Specializing In Breakups)
Hey that'south me!
😉
Alright so does it mean anything if your ex boyfriend hugs you?
Well, that's a question that ultimately has two answers depending on the context.
You encounter, I am of the listen that context is everything when it comes to these kind of scenarios.
Allow me to elaborate.
Permit's pretend for a moment that you and your ex beau have but cleaved upwardly and the 2 of you decide that yous should exchange your things (every bit is typically the custom) and somewhere during that very brief interaction he gives y'all a very quick hug.
Kind of like this,
Well, in that case I'm inclined to believe that it's just a hug.
Cipher more…
Now, let's switch gears for a moment and completely change the context.
Permit's imagine that it's been a few months since y'all and your ex broke up.
The two of y'all have been flirting a lot recently and he asks if he can run into you and you readily accept.
During this interaction he literally says,
I have missed you so much
He then hugs y'all pulling you in tight and holds the hug for what seems similar an eternity.
Yous cook in his artillery equally you feel exactly where you lot are supposed to be.
In this item case I would say that, that detail hug probably means something.
And then, to sum upwardly I remember that when it comes to hugging it'southward all a matter of context.
Context is everything.
But let's see what the other experts have to say.
Expert Take #two: Karen J. Helfrich, LCSW-C (Psychotherapist)
First up with take Karen J. Helfrich from world wide web.karenjhelfrich.com. Now, Karen is a Licensed Psychoterapist and I thought she had a actually fascinating take.
Hither's what she had to say,
"How-do-you-do, Chris!
This is a corking question. In general, I counsel clients that unless the hug is following a declaration of intent to get back together, a hug is but a hug and doesn't "mean" annihilation. In full general, if a man is interested, in that location is no question about whether or not he is interested. Women deal in subtlety, not guys. It is important to make decisions based off behavior you can see, not feelings you lot tin can but imagine. In a interruption-upwards state of affairs, the feelings are likewise stiff and deject judgement. If he'due south not super clear, it'south just a hug.
Thanks, Chris!
Warmly,
Karen
P.S. I have a Lily, too! They are the best!"
If you didn't know my daughter's name is Lilly,
(Here is my Lilly, Karen!)
And so, where I was all near the context of the hug, Karen was all near the clarity of it!
In other words, it is her conventionalities that in guild for a hug to truly mean something a homo will make some type of deceleration of intent before engaging in the act.
For example, if he says "I love yous" and then hugs you then the hug probably ways something.
Allow'due south move on to our next skilful!
Good Take #3: Davida Rappaport (Psychic, Speaker, Tarot Instructor)
I thought information technology would be super fun to get a quote from a psychic and that'due south when I was introduced to Davida Rappaport!
So, here is what she had to say,
"Many of my clients want to know about re-uniting with ex-boyfriends. They tend to obsess over them because they still honey them (even if the human relationship might have been calumniating) and want them back.
Because dating is hard, they find information technology easier to want to go dorsum to their ex-boyfriends. They enquire me if their ex still loves them or misses them or thinks about them, which is an answer I cannot ethically provide them. What I can do is provide them with possible answers.
Each human relationship is unique, even if like and there is no right answer. The quality of the hug makes a difference. Here are a few options for you lot:
- Sometimes when exes see ane another, they may hug. Depending upon what their human relationship was like prior to the break up would determine the significance of the hug.
- If this hug is not the aforementioned type of hug experienced when they were dating, it may just exist a friendly hug – a "Hello, how are you?" blazon of hug.
- If the hug is warm, loving and genuine, this shows that the ex-boyfriend still cares about his ex-girlfriend; he may, indeed, nonetheless honey her. It does not necessarily mean he desire to re-kindle the relationship. It may be, simply it is upwardly to the ex-girlfriend to inquire if he wants to get back together again. Assumptions create messy emotions and imaginations run rampant.
- If a man still cares about his ex-girlfriend, it does not necessarily mean he wants to get dorsum together with her. I try to remind my clients that they shouldn't read too much into the hug. If in doubt, inquire him what he is feeling.
- If the ending of the human relationship was stormy and hard, assume that whatsoever type of hug is offered and received, it is just a friendly hug.
I hope this helps."
I think this is a really great take by Davida. She took a scattershot approach to answering my question if a hug ways anything from an ex boyfriend.
So, instead of giving a general respond she decided to talk about the specifics of the hug.
Was the hug the same type of hug you used to experience before the breakup?
Was the hug warm, loving and genuine?
But Davida also fabricated it articulate that information technology's of import to not read besides much into the hug. Assumptions can create messy emotions after all (her words non mine.)
And so, what is Davida's ultimate take on if a hug ways annihilation?
Well, I retrieve information technology'south kind of like to both experts i & 2.
In other words, it looks like a blueprint is starting to grade.
Allow's motility on to our next expert.
Expert Have #4: Erika Martinez, Psy.D
Next upwardly nosotros have a clinical psychologist located in Miami named Erika Martinez (hey that's shut to where I am.)
Anyways, hither's what Erika had to say to my research,
Hullo Chris:
I saw your query and idea I could exist of some help. I'm a clinical psychologist in Miami, FL, and I love helping young professional millennials (early 20s to belatedly 30s) become unstuck in love, work, and life.
Most of my clients are young professionals (tardily 20s to 30s) navigating the dating waters of Miami's tough dating scene.
Does it mean anything when an ex swain hugs their ex girlfriend?
Information technology depends on the nature of the hug. If it's a quick "nice to meet you" hug, then it probably doesn't mean anything. But if he lingers or prolongs the hug, then peradventure he's nevertheless got some feelings for y'all. Chances are there's no spark left if information technology's an awkward hug, though.
What is the possibility that the ex swain still likes their ex girlfriend?
It's a possibility. He liked her once before after all. Just this really depends on how the relationship unfolded, how it ended, and if there was closure.
Are they only being friendly?
If they run in the same circles and coincide oftentimes, then aye, it is possible that he'southward beingness cordial.
I similar Erika'southward take!
Desire to know why?
It's almost exactly the same as mine (and I tend to be biased towards myself.)
Good job Erika!
Ok, all kidding aside lets move on to expert 5.
Good Take #five: Ms Hitch (Earth Renowned Relationship Skilful)
I know what you lot are thinking,
It's like the woman version of Hitch!
Pretty awesome, right?
You lot tin can find Ms Hitch here so make certain you lot check out her website and support everything she is doing 🙂 .
But what does she have to say nigh hugs?
From the height,
Does it mean annihilation when an ex boyfriend hugs their ex girlfriend?
"No, not at all. We accept to terminate thinking too far into things, that don't even matter."
What is the possibility that the ex boyfriend still likes their ex girlfriend?
"Liking" doesn't mean Anything! But considering you lot similar somebody does non mean you want to exist with them. That is why they are an Ex and you didn't try to brand information technology work because you simply "LIKE" them."
Are they only existence friendly?
"Yep, and what is wrong with just beingness friendly. That is what we are suppose to practice as beings."
Then, it looks like Ms Hitch took a hard stance against a hug meaning anything.
Fascinating.
Now, before we commencement adding up all the opinions to encounter what the nigh mutual reply was lets hear from our concluding skillful.
Expert Accept #6: David Bennett (Certified Counselor)
Adjacent up we have David Bennett.
David runs a very pop website called The Pop Human. Notwithstanding, what I institute to exist even more fascinating is that he runs information technology with his identical twin brother!
So, here is what David had to say about an ex hugging you and if it means anything.
When an ex hugs a girlfriend, it could mean a variety of things. The key is to discover the other torso language associated with it. For case, how tight is the hug? Is it a simple and quick hug? If information technology elementary, quick, and awkward, it is zip romantic, and the swain may view it as simply beingness nice.
However, if the hug lasts a while, and is the blazon of hug he gave dorsum when the relationship was happy, then he may still like his ex-girlfriend. Ultimately, most exes want to stay away from their erstwhile partners, then any blazon of physical contact, especially a long hug, could be a sign he is still interested.
Fascinating…
David is a big laic in the body language associated with the hug.
Noted, kind sir!
Now allow'due south motion on to the super fun part and consolidate all of the expert answers to see if a design emerges on what the collective group thinks almost on if an ex hugging you means anything.
Consolidating The Expert Takes
There were a total of 6 experts who were kind enough to requite me their opinion.
Now, the thing that I institute actually interesting is that each 1 of us had very similar, notwithstanding slightly different takes on an ex hugging you.
Chris Seiter (me): In social club to determine if a hug from your ex means something you lot need to look at the context of the hug.
Karen J. Helfrich: Karen believed that the clarity of the hug was the most important matter to study. If a man makes a announcement of intent earlier he hugs y'all then that hug probably means something.
Davida Rappaport: Davida's reply was pretty much a combination between my answer and Karen J. Helfrich'south.
Erika Martinez: I liked Erika's respond considering it was very similar to mine and similar I said, I am a tad flake biased 😉 . Still, I can besides see a footling bit of Karen and Davida'southward answer wrapped up into hers (looks like we take a pattern begging to form.)
Ms Hitch: Ms Hitch decided to have a pretty hard line on if a hug means something between an ex. She apartment out said no! So, Ms Hitch breaks from the overall pattern that nosotros had developing. Yet, there is a lot of truth to the points she makes.
David Bennett: David had a actually fascinating take I idea. He was all virtually the trunk language of the hug. Now, there were a few other experts who cited torso language in their answers, namely me, Davida and Erika.
The goal here is to come up with a atypical answer on if it means when an ex swain hugs you.
Now, in that location are a lot of different means to skin this cat merely I think the easiest fashion is to look at all of the experts answers in a higher place and see which function of the answer was repeated the nearly amongst us.
So, give me a 2nd as I wave my magic wand every bit I find out the answer
…….
……..
(waving wand)
……..
………
(Still waving)
…….
………..
Ok, in that location was one common theme among four of our six experts.
Trunk Language!
- I fabricated mention of body language in my answer
- Davida briefly fabricated mention of it in hers
- Erika followed adjust
- And finally David'southward entire answer was about body linguistic communication.
So, co-ordinate to the bulk of our experts torso linguistic communication plays a gigantic role in determining if your ex boyfriends hug means annihilation.
How did the hug feel?
Was it warm and loving?
Was it common cold and quick?
How long did the hug last for?
All of these things can give you insight into what a hug from your ex means!
Source: https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/does-it-mean-anything-when-my-ex-boyfriend-hugs-me/
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